Refund Policy

1. How to Request a Refund

Email us at registrar@asshole.university with the word REFUND in the subject line. Include:

• The email address used at checkout.
• Your order number, or the approximate date and amount of the purchase.
• A brief note (optional) about what went wrong. It genuinely helps us improve, but it is not required for approval.

We respond to refund requests within two business days and, in most cases, issue the refund the same day we reply.

2. What Happens After Approval

Refunds are issued through Stripe to the original payment method (card, Apple Pay, Google Pay, Link, or other method used at checkout). Stripe typically returns the funds to your bank or card within five (5) to ten (10) business days, depending on your issuer. International card issuers sometimes take a little longer.

Upon refund, any access to digital products, membership benefits, or course materials tied to that order is revoked. Any certificate issued on the refunded order is considered rescinded.

(The rescission is philosophical more than practical — the University has no enforcement arm beyond a quiet note in the ledger.)

3. Limited Exceptions

A small number of purchases fall outside the seven-day window, in every case because the value has already been delivered or scheduled at real cost:

• Subscription periods already elapsed. For Inner Circle and similar recurring memberships, any months that have fully elapsed are non-refundable. Cancel at any time and you will not be billed for the next period; the current period runs out its term.
• Coaching sessions already held. Once a one-on-one session has taken place, it is non-refundable. If you need to reschedule before the session, email us at least twenty-four (24) hours in advance.
• Corporate workshops once scheduled. Group workshops are non-refundable once a date has been confirmed in writing, because we reserve facilitator time on your behalf. They remain rescheduleable up to seven (7) days before the event.
• Refunds requested more than seven (7) days after purchase. Outside the window, refunds are at our discretion and generally granted only in the case of a verifiable billing error.

4. Certificates Already Posted, Framed, or Displayed

If you have already downloaded, printed, framed, gifted, or posted your certificate to social media before requesting a refund, it is still eligible inside the seven-day window. The Registrar merely wishes to note the awkwardness of simultaneously celebrating a degree and asking for your money back. We will process the refund all the same.

(The University has neither the inclination nor the legal authority to compel you to take down a tweet. Frame it if you like.)

5. A Gentle Word on Chargebacks

If something goes wrong, please email us before filing a chargeback with your bank. Chargebacks take weeks, cost both parties money, and are almost always slower than a direct refund. We have never refused an in-window refund request, and we would rather keep that record than dispute a charge.

6. Verifying the Refund Landed

Once we process a refund, Stripe emails a confirmation to the address on file. The refund appears on your statement as a credit with the same descriptor as the original charge (e.g., STRIPE *ASSHOLE UNIV). If you do not see the credit on your statement after ten business days, check your spam folder for the Stripe email, then reply to our confirmation and we will open a trace with Stripe on your behalf.

7. Contact

Refund questions, billing disputes, and reschedule requests go to registrar@asshole.university. For everything else, see our contact directory.